The Three-Eyed Homer Shirt: As Perfect as a Hundred Slices of American Cheese
Ever wanted to wear a piece of Springfield history without having to climb the Murderhorn or steal the Shelbyville lemon tree?
Behold: the Three-Eyed Homer Shirt! Inspired by the time Bart caught Blinky — Springfield’s favorite three-eyed fish and least favorite sushi roll — this shirt is a glowing reminder that nuclear safety standards are more of a suggestion than a rule.
Made from ring-spun cotton softer than a steamed ham and tougher than Grimey’s work ethic, this classic fit beauty works for any occasion.
Whether you’re lounging like a Stonecutter, dancing like nobody’s watching at the Springfield Film Festival, or just trying to outwit a monorail salesman, this shirt will keep you looking cool as Disco Stu’s platform shoes.
Product Features:
Softer Than a Gummy Venus de Milo: Premium ring-spun cotton fabric that even Smithers would call "exquisite."
Classic Fit: Perfect for casual Fridays at the power plant or sneaking into your neighbor’s pool.
Tear-Away Label: No more itchy necks — unlike that time Homer wore the Mr. Plow jacket without a shirt underneath.
Ethically Sourced Cotton: Straight from the good side of Cypress Creek, where the hammocks are plentiful.
Versatile AF: Dress it up, dress it down, or pair it with a Pin Pals bowling shirt for that layered look.
So slap this baby on, grab a Duff, and bask in the glow of pure Springfield nostalgia.
Just don’t let Mr. Burns see you wearing it… you might end up on the next “Up with Mutants” campaign.
